Tuesday, February 21, 2012

Isagenix: Days 4- whatever day I'm on now


I've done it!


I have finally gotten back to my original weight.  I'll tell you how it all went down.  On Friday I began the 2-day super-cleanse, which was essentially a fast.
I was obsessed.  Every 30 seconds I would check the list to see what time I was to take the next supplement. 
By Saturday evening, I was shot and broken down.  I had some homemade pizza.  And wine.  Nothing on the planet tasted better to me then the hot mozzarella and sweet marinara cascading into my empty stomach.


The following morning, I stepped onto the scale and peeked at the florescent digits that noted my progress.  
Hooray!  Three pounds dropped since the start  of this horrific journey.  That day I was walking on air, not only because I was (very slightly) lighter, but also I was back to a “shake day,” meaning I could eat food for lunch.  Now, the kids and I attended a birthday party that afternoon, so I was just careful with what I put in my mouth.  Raw carrot sticks, some meat out of my hero sandwich, and I HAD to taste the cake, but I didn't engorge.  I had my shake for dinner, then took a look at my weight in the morning.  
It couldn't be right.
I got off the scale and stepped back onto it.
Up 5 pounds.  How was it even possible?   That meant that I had gained 2 pounds from my original weight, had spent a small fortune on the program, and had been in a constant state of torture for the past several days.


Yesterday, I started out the day as usual: a shake, shot of berry juice, and a pill at 7, a hard-boiled egg at 9, then lunch at 12:30.  I had my afternoon snack then breathed in the enticing aroma from the kitchen.  Kyle (who had long-since given up on this stupid plan) was cooking, creating a fresh hummus, quinoa salad, a kale-and-white-bean-soup.  It smelled spectacular, and I wasn't about to miss out on the wonderfulness that this meal had to offer, so I indulged.  Instead of the shake I opted for a serving of the soup and salad, and was not disappointed.  
It was right then and there that I decided that I needed to change the Isagenix plan to fit me a little better.  I'll see how it goes.


My new plan:

  • 7 am: shake, shot, and pill
  • 9 am: snack (apple)
  • 12:30 pm: shake
  • 2 pm: snack (hard-boiled egg), pill
  • 3:30 pm: snack (“IsaDelight” dark chocolate)
  • 5ish: dinner (something light)



Basically, I'll be switching lunch and dinner so I at least have a little something to look forward to.  Hopefully it doesn't mess up the plan too much.  It can't get any worse then me gaining weight (famous last words).


p.s. I did have some good lunches so far- suitable for vegetarians and/or weight-loss-seekers:




Carrot-Apple Wrap


Spread hummus (low-fat) on a (sprouted-wheat) tortilla, sprinkle hemp seeds (available in the self-serve bins at Whole Foods) onto it. The filling is julienned carrots, sliced apples, and some arugula.  Wrap it up and enjoy!












Cucumber Salad Wrap
Tastes a little like a Greek salad wrap, minus the olives and feta
And yes, it's on one of my daughter's "Little Mermaid" plates
Make a dressing of olive oil, white wine vinegar, minced garlic, lemon juice, and chopped fresh parsley.  Brush some of the dressing onto a warmed wrap (again, sprouted wheat, if you can find them). Sprinkle with hemp seeds.  In a bowl, combine chopped cucumbers, chopped tomato, chopped cashews, and lettuce.  Pour the remainder of the dressing in with the veggies and toss.  Pour the mixture onto the wrap and roll it up.  Bon appetit!

Thursday, February 16, 2012

Isagenix Cleanse: Day 2


Okay, so this is more a summary of the events that transpired during the remainder of the day yesterday (you can think of it as Day 1- Part Deux).  


Therefore, let's continue with...


February 15
Pre-Cleanse Day


I think the first thing that needs to be done is to take the prefix “pre” out of the day, since it makes it sound as though this is a simple undertaking.


After my six almond snack at 9:00 and 87 glasses of water, I was able to eat lunch at 12:30.  I made baked salmon (that was completely over-cooked) and a spinach salad with strawberries.  I never thought I could love strawberries as much as I did in that moment.


At 2 I got another morsel, so I chose to consume one of the “Snacks!” that came with the system.  It looked like a brown anti-acid pill, but I ate it anyway.  Not completely disgusting- a little chalky, but a lot of chocolate flavor packed in.
Yummy snack. Oh sorry I meant, "Snacks!"




I went to the dentist that afternoon for a cleaning and took a snack with me for after the appointment.  What's the worst thing you could possibly chew on after getting your teeth and gums scraped?


That's right, I brought celery sticks.  It was a painful experience, but I got them down.


At 5, I got to have “dinner.”  I truly have no idea why the call it that, since it is just a shake.  I waited around for Kyle to get home from his late appointment.  When he finally got in at 9, we stared at each other in commiseration.  Why would we do this to ourselves?


Health, skinniness, youth, and does it make me an over all nicer person?  We'll see.


We went to bed early, from both exhaustion and hunger.  As our heads hit the pillow, Kyle mentioned that I should be aware that he might eat something inappropriate in his sleep: the pillow, remote, or dog.  I said I would be listening for it.


This morning, we start all over again with the pre-cleanse.  So far, I downed the horrific juice (I put it in a shot glass this time to pop it down my throat all at once), the shake, and the pill.  I had a snack a couple hours later of a hard-boiled egg.  


Now I sit here wait for lunch.  Twelve-thirty cannot come quickly enough.

Wednesday, February 15, 2012

Isagenix Cleanse: Day 1

I thought if I added a swirly straw to the shake, it would make it more "fun"

In an effort to not be one of those people who look the same after pregnancy as they do in the ninth month, I thought I'd kick-start my post-pregnancy weight loss with the Isagenix cleanse.  It's supposed to rid the body of it's toxins and, wow, I have a lot of those floating around.  I think the system will be working the hardest to eradicate the Wendy's cheeseburgers that I chose to consume often during those last few months.

I predict that the most difficult things to abandon during the next 11 days will be the caffeine (No pick-me-up?  How will I survive?) and the alcohol (Mama likes a glass of wine at the end of the day).

The plusses are that I will be promoting a healthy lifestyle (blah, blah, blah...) and I don't have to think about dinner for almost 2 weeks (because I don't get any.  Boo).

Anyway, I thought I would document the process a bit for y'all. So here it goes...

Last Week

The package arrived containing all the “materials.”  We actually purchased the 30-day supply for the two of us to each do the 9-day program (my husband, very sweetly, agreed to do it with me for support).  It was very overwhelming, but I sat down and mapped out all our meals, then went to the grocery store and purchased the items we would need during the cleanse.

Today, February 15
Pre-Cleanse Day

We decided to begin the process after Valentine's day.  I indulged on the days leading up to this on chocolates, cookies, and cheese, figuring that I might as well fill up on toxins and impurities before purging them out of my system.

I woke up at 4:15 because I couldn't sleep (I must have been EXCITED! Insert sarcasm), but “breakfast” wasn't until 7, so I tried to keep busy.

I needed to weigh myself and take many measurements so I can be assured that it worked.  Kylt said that I shouldn't measure myself over sweats, but I just figured it would make my results more dramatic at the end of this whole thing.

When I finally got the chance to consume my morning meal, it consisted of

  • A natural accelerator pill
  • a couple ounces of a berry drink
  • a chocolate shake


A few things: The horse pill better “accelerate” my weight loss (we'll see about that one), the drink (I'll call it berry-inspired, rather than flavored) was so gross that I could barely get it down (I think Kyle's exact words were, "Oh my God, it tastes like - and then some expletive that I'm not going to repeat here), but the shake was good (How can you go wrong with a chocolate shake?).

At 9 am I got to have a snack.  I opted for a couple (6, actually) almonds.  And water.  It is now 9:30 and I'm starving.  We'll see how the rest of the day goes.

Friday, February 10, 2012

Sadie's Story




I was away at college when my sister called me excitedly. “I got a puppy!”


Not expecting this news at all, I asked question after question.  “How big?”


“Really little.  Like a kitten.”


“What color?”


“She's all black with what looks like grey eyeliner around her eyes.”
Very fashionable


She sounded really cute, and when I came home for a break I was not disappointed.  Sadie looked up at me with one ear straight up in the air and one flopping down on the side of her head.  She was also much bigger then any kitten I had seen!


“They're always like that,”  Maggie said, pointing to her ears.  “I think someone tried to clip them, but one didn't take.”
Resting on a pillow


Throughout the years, Sadie proved to be a great dog with a sweet disposition.  When it came time for Maggie to go away to college herself and for my mom to move out of the state, however, we ran into a bit of a conundrum.  What do we do about Sadie?


The moment their eyes met, the answer was clear.  My husband and Sadie were like soul mates.  
With her shirt on


Sadie came to live with us, and couldn't have been happier with her new living situation.  Kyle  took Sadie on several walks a day, wrestled with her, and snuggled at the end of the day.  She was an integral part of our little family.














Meeting Winnie for the first time
A lot of changes happened along the way the Sadie took in stride.  We got Winnie, a very high-energy puggle, Avery was born, and most recently, Hunter was born as well.  We've moved, gone on trips, and changed a lot of our lifestyle as a result of our growing family, but Sadie was a constant in our lives.














As time moved forward, Sadie got older before our eyes, and recently has been getting very sick.  When Kyle took her to the vet last night, she didn't come home.




Rest in peace, old girl.  We'll miss you.


Thursday, February 9, 2012

The Boo-Boo


I held in the curses that I could feel escaping my lips as I lay on the floor, wincing in pain.  “Ow. Ow. Ow,” I repeated over and over, in the hopes that the mere recitation of the syllable would cure the ache in my knee. 


I could see her staring at me from her easel in the corner, just waiting to repeat any inappropriate outburst that I allowed to come out.  So I held it all in.


For the 97th time over the course of six years in that house, I had slipped on the wood floors while wearing socks.  Why would I have learned my lesson?


So, there I sat, knee clutched tightly, rocking back and forth.


“What are you doing, Mommy?”  Avery gently inquired.


“Nothing.  I fell.”


“Do you have a boo-boo?”


I responded through gritted teeth, “Yeah- I think it's a bruise.”  Why wasn't it feeling better yet?


“Do you need a band aid?”  Now she seemed truly concerned.


“Nope.”


Then, without any prompting, Avery came over and kissed my knee and gave me a giant hug.  


It's moments like these that make me so thankful to be a mom.  Even through a little pain, something so simple as your child's kiss can make everything all better.

Tuesday, February 7, 2012

What is Love: Take 2

As Valentine's Day quickly approaches (and I seem to have less and less time to dedicate to new pieces), I thought I'd re-post this from last year. 



When I was a tyke, my friend Jill and I came up with a song that expressed lyrics to the world (well, to our parents who were forced to listen- and videotape- all of our *charming* ballads) that questioned the reality of that reclusive, yet sublime sensation: “What is love? Wh-wh-wh- what is love? What is love all about? What can I do to find out? I wanna know what it's all about. Tell me now- I wanna know what love is...”

Needless to say, Jill and I did not end up as famous performers or songwriters, yet even as I sit here today, the same inquiries invade my mind: What is love? I know that I have it with my husband, my daughter, my family; I know that I would swim in a vat of dead rodents for them if need be, but actually defining the emotion in words seems impossible to me.

As that eminent day approaches, I scoured the internet in search of the various definitions of the word, in order to get a better idea:

Love”
  • have a great affection or liking for (I have great affection for Taco Bell- but do I love it? )
  • to be enamored with (I am completely enamored by each actor on Modern Family- but is it love?)
  • a score of zero in tennis or squash (romantic- I know)
  • to get pleasure from (Oo-la-la)

Alright- perhaps these definitions weren't exactly what I was looking for. I'll just leave it up to the experts:
  • “One word frees us of all the weight and pain of life: That word is love.” ~Sophocles
  • “We love because it's the only true adventure.” ~Nikki Giovanni
  • “Love is the master key that opens the gates of happiness.” ~Robert Mitchum
  • “Love makes your soul crawl out of its hiding place.” ~Zora Neale Hurston

Okay...

Since I'm still pretty unsure about the definition of what love actually is, I will pose this question to you:

What is love?

p.s.- Ever since I wrote the question I can't seem to get the car scene from “Night at the Roxbury out of my head.

Tuesday, January 31, 2012

^ What's Going on Up There? ^

Take a look at the tabs below the title and picture.

A little lower.
To the left.
Okay, good.

Check them out if you get a chance- I'm curious to know what readers think about the short stories that I posted, and how I can make improvements or what I should continue.

p.s.- Don't say anything too mean, or I'll cry.

It Takes Having Two to Realize how Easy it Is to Have One


Here I am again, back to my normal (and I use the term loosely) self. During the nine straight months of nausea, irritability, and general sickness, I couldn't muster up the charge to write anything; let alone cook, clean, or do anything other than make sure my toddler didn't dive off elevated surfaces head-first. But now I sit with ten minutes of “me time” for the first instance since Hunter was born in November. Granted, Avery is bopping her Diego and Baby Jaguar toys up and down my left arm, but you take what you can get.

Don't misread my intention from the title of my post; I don't mean to imply that infants aren't easy (eating, sleeping, pooping, repeat- that's their daily schedule, correct?), but I had Avery's and my days completely mapped out before, and now it takes seven hours to get out of the house.
If asked what she'd like to wear, Avery's choice is a frilly dress each time.  She usually layers a half a dozen necklaces on top, too.  Such a fashionista.


So, I ask you to please share- what are some of your personal “tricks” to make child-rearing a delightful experience?

I'll go first: after breast feeding for a grand total of two weeks, we began exclusively formula-feeding the baby (an expense and a chore to make). Using the powder (much cheaper than the pre-made stuff), I make a huge batch that lasts about two days and pour into a pitcher.

I have no idea if this is an innovative idea or something that is so antiquated that I should be given the corny award for excellence in a cliched lifestyle, but I thought I'd pony up a response as well.

Anyway, here's my new kid...
"Sometimes I like to lie in a basket."

Tuesday, May 3, 2011

A Guessing Game



So here are some hints...

  1. I have gained an exorbitant amount of weight (read: not good for the ol' bikini-bod) in the past few months.
  2. Those working the drive-through at Wendy's, Taco Bell, and McDonald's are starting to recognize my voice and ask if I want “the usual.”  I have also "forgotten" my way to the gym (which, in actuality, could have something to do with hint #1).
  3. The passengers sitting near me on the plane home from Florida last week were not pleased when I spent a half hour throwing up into the air-sick bag.
  4. Grey motion-sickness wristbands have become a part of my everyday fashion attire (I'm trying to start a new trend).
  5. Avery is no longer scared of the doctor, since when we go now, it's always for me.

Figured it out yet?

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